Girls On Top: Explicit Erotica For Women

Editor:  Violet Blue

I truly enjoyed this collection, mostly because it was all about taking chances. There were stories involving gender roles, cross-dressing, gay issues, subcultures and cultures, BDSM, and so much more. Each story found a way to go beyond the rudimentary motions of sex to find a way to say something more about society as well as the individual. There were opportunities to see a character get into something he or she had not experienced before, and it was refreshing to see some doubt, some trial and error; in that way, the characters were much more human than mere manifestations of animal instinct. There were roads to travel, narrow little perilous bridges to cross, relationships at stake. To me, that is more exciting than just reading the "hot" parts and not having more than a sham of a story to drape them.

I liked being able to see these stories play out and have to think about how I would feel or what I would do in the situation if I had the guts, which I usually don't in my mild-mannered reality. Maybe after reading this, I will reconsider some of my boundaries that I keep and how firm they really should be.

What I did not like so much was the story about the robbers. I cannot see her just going for a tryst with the criminals like that. Also, if the cops find her with them like that, she's in trouble as well because she's going to look like an accomplice. A bit of the writing in the rest of the book was a bit flimsy. There were a few typos, including one character being called by another character's name, but overall, the editing was fairly well-done. This was an exciting collection with a bit of something for everyone who wants to see evidence of more exciting sex lives.

Overall rating:  4 of 5 Stars

Dirty Girls: Erotica for Women

Editor:  Rachel Kramer Bussel

Pretty good. My first time reading an erotica collection. I was disappointed with the half-hearted attempt at stream-of-consciousness in the story "A Prayer to Be Made Cocksure"--especially since the first two pages were so confusing that I thought the story was about two men. The rest of the stories were quite good and usually worked an unexpected angle.

Overall Rating:  4 of 5 Stars 

Most Likely You Go Your Way and I'll Go Mine

Author:  Ben Tanzer

The first thing I thought when I finished this book was, that I saw the ending coming relationship-wise. It matters, not because I need a shock at the end of every book I read (I really don't). It matters because there is a natural progression to the end, and it feels like there would be loose ends if it ended differently. The couple that ends up together at the end have to work for what they have, to quit looking at the little things for evidence that they should be together and just go with where they are being driven, to see that their brokenhearted balms only inflame the injury they ultimately inflict upon themselves. With the other couple, it is pretty clear what their functions are in the story, and that was fine, if not mildly comforting. Not everyone reaches a state of relationship stasis at the same time, and a double-wedding ending would seem contrite.

I liked the indecision, the way at this age you never know what you should really do, especially when everyone else around you seems to know better. When Geoff asks his co-workers, they each speak in turn in a succinct succession, and they all bring their job title-shaded "expertise" to the table, even though they are just as lost as Geoff. they tell him what they would do, how they would want things to be, but they expose a bit of maturity in not telling him he has to do it their way despite the general immaturity of these suggestions. Jen has her sister and best friend to guide her, who falter along the paths of their own love lives but she still wonders if she should model after them. These are very real examples of how we use peer pressure to make decisions in our youth, and sometimes beyond.

Geoff and Jen also look to their parents, while acknowledging the parents' choices have led to dysfunction but still wanting to turn to the one who has helped them since their birth. I was a bit surprised to see the parents' ability to overlook their children's active sexuality when they feel like they may need to move on or when they move too quickly. Perhaps this is because I am from a small town with parents who are sexually conservative that I can't really talk to about intimate matters...even if I wanted to. This parenting model in the book feels like it comes from a place of personal liberation. Still, I was glad to see a model of caring parenting with lots of honesty. They seem a bit too much like friends at times, as is the case in some parent-child relationships, but they ultimately truly want the best for their children. Steven is a good addition because he not only fills out the story a bit more; he also shows that most parents will not give up on a child even when they struggle so greatly.

What I didn't like was the incredible sameness of the characters at times. They all have their own things going on and individual things to work out, but some things are a bit too close. Both Geoff and Jen had a parent move out when they were children. Geoff and Jen are paralyzed at times by their own neurosis and indecision. These are questions that enter every relationship, but they feel them at the same time from the start of the relationship. They both rely on a parent and either a group of friends or a friend and a sister for advice that gets them nowhere most of the time. This is realistic, but I would like to see maybe one struggle more individually or have a more adept sounding board board to switch things up. The uncaring girl with the tattoo was a good way to switch things up and to demonstrate to Geoff what not to want.

At first I mistook the brief chapters as laziness or ineptitude, and then I saw the genius of being able to switch between perspective so neatly, which is something I think a lot of other authors have a problem with. Also, the short snips and resulting disjointed feel of the quick switching of gears says something more of the inattention of youth and the aimlessness of those who are uncertain. I'm glad sometimes the jumps also served to move to a different point in time. This probably eliminated some filler in a book that keeps to a snappy clip. I think it is somewhat courageous to take a chance with a tableau-like series of vignettes instead of just moving beginning to end and acting like nothing else happens in between. On the topic of time, I think the time period is well-established in many ways: the slang, the music references, the attitudes, the bombing especially since it can be pinpointed in time. I also like that they mention past things they still like, such as Bob Dylan, since it's more realistic not to just deal with what is currently popular. It's nice to see a bit of nostalgia in a nostalgic novel. I think the title itself is good because it has a pop culture reference as a Bob Dylan song and sets a real tone for the story to come. I was supremely pleased to see mention of journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" mentioned, both because of its status as one of my favorite songs and also because it is meaningful to the text on a level beyond simply being mentioned.

What I couldn't stand is the numerous errors. Winona Ryder's name is spelled differently in different parts of the book, and another celebrity's name is misspelled, both of which could be remedied with a quick visit to imdb.com or similar simple research. The errors of grammar and other spelling (I spotted the wrong "too" once, for example) could also stand to be fixed. Since I majored in writing in college, I realize the over-sprinkling commas are most likely stylistic, standing in for natural pauses, another manifestation of the uncertain, among other things. I think it does turn off a quantity of readers who may not realize this, so it's a gutsy decision that makes repeating the reasoning worth it. Still, there were some straight punctuation errors. There is even one or two in the author bio and blurb on the back cover.

Overall, I really liked this book. I can see beyond its shortcomings to a story that feels very natural emotionally to someone who has dated or tried to get advice and came up wanting. I saw myself in the characters and wanted the best for them because of it. I felt several times that i wished I had been a part of the scene as it happened, to have such haphazard control over my flailing life. I wanted to have friends who could accept me and give me their frankness instead of playing games to try to hide their hearts and ill choices in exchange for trying to act like the ideal is always achievable. The stringency of the rules and thorough discussions of such rules remind me of how important standards are in life and how the ones society sets forth mean little when we want something different. Just reading this book felt like that for me. I don't like the best-sellers--I crave something a bit more unique, more risk-taking. I found that in much of this book and hope others will as well.

Overall Rating:  4 of 5 Stars

The Undertaking: Life Studies from the Dismal Trade

Author:  Thomas Lynch

Perhaps my fascination with this book says a little something of my darker side, but when it's a book this good, I don't mind letting the skeleton out of the closet for a nice jaunt. The essays are eloquent as only the words of a poet can be (yes, he is a poet as well as an undertaker!) with a sprinkling of profanity and such to keep Lynch human. The points of his poignant essays hit home with their well-made arguments and other sides of the story. I can only wish when my time comes I have someone like Lynch to help me along on my final journey.

Overall Rating:  5 of 5 Stars

Freecycle

http://www.freecycle.org/

I have been using the Freecycle program for approximately three years now. In the beginning, I joined out of curiosity and the absurd desire to get awesome things for absolutely free. The program is free to participate in as far as money goes, but it is not without commitment. I hope to convey this notion of giving and taking by illustrating my own experience with the program.

I don’t remember how I first heard about Freecycle--probably on TV or in a magazine--but once I found out about it, I quickly searched it out. While you can find a Freecycle page on Facebook, to actually participate you have to go through Yahoo, specifically through the Yahoo Groups. The groups can be accessed at the bottom of the Yahoo homepage. This leads to a page where you can search the current groups (or create your own). Use the keywords “Freecycle” and your town or county with state. Large cities like New York usually have their own group, but where I live in Southern Indiana, it is split up by county; I am a member of ClarkCtyINFreecycle, for instance. Follow the directions on the page, respond to the initial message they send you by replying to the e-mail, and you’re in!

When someone joins the network, they are expected to post an initial offer of something they would like to give away. This could be an animal, clothes, food, toys, housewares, magazines, or anything they think someone else would enjoy or use. My first offering was unopened and unexpired instant baby cereal, items which were quickly responded to and in high demand, making it difficult to choose who to give to. The offering post should include your city, the name of the item, and a description, typically including any information such as an item’s condition. It’s okay if the shirts have stains, because someone out there may be looking for something to wear while puttering around the yard. A table with a scuffed surface may be just fine for someone who has no table or is starting their life over like so many seem to be, and can easily be remedied with a tablecloth. It’s all about disclosure.

Another thing to consider, if you are offering a number of things, give an idea of approximate size.

Several months ago I was excited to hear that I was chosen to pick up “books, toys, and holiday decorations,” items received from a fellow Freecycler that were more than this person could use. Since I love getting cheap or free books and decorations, I thought it was going to be an awesome experience. Normally this would mean a medium or large box, so I figured I would pick it up on my way back from getting my younger daughter from preschool. This was a “porch pick-up”, which means the giver would leave the items out on the porch and the receiver picks the item up and leaves quietly, which can be very convenient with busy schedules or hesitant people. Still, I messaged the person with a time when I thought I would come through, but impending rain threatened to ruin the items, so she messaged me and told me to pick them up ASAP. I looked up the directions to her house and was on my way, several hours ahead of what I had planned. Since I had no real plans that day, this was no big deal.

When I reached my destination, I was surprised to see the items were not waiting on the porch, but instead out by the road alongside the mailbox and some full trash cans. I was even more surprised to find that there was not the expected box or trash bag. What I found was a short wooden VHS shelf full of tapes, about five to eight cardboard boxes of books of all types, and a white kitchen bag of decorations, mostly fat Christmas light bulbs. The shelf alone placed long-wise took up my entire backseat, laid across my daughter’s booster seat. The books took up the rest of the room in my car and trunk. As I drove away, trying to find my way back home, I circled back and stopped to look at two large black trash bags, remembering the toys advertised. Opening them up, I saw they were a mix of more decorations and the toys. I ripped one bag open and crammed its contents in any space and jammed the other up front, barely able to maneuver the gear shift, exhausted from heavy lifting and anxious to get home. Had I waited until I picked up my daughter, I would have had both girls with me and would probably have needed a second trip.

When I lugged the items into the house to see the damage, my living room was full, and I dreaded what my husband would say when he saw what I had brought home with me. I would have left half of it or more if I wasn’t afraid of being reported for being a no-show. Two reports can result in expulsion from the group. Immediately I emptied one of the boxes on the couch and sorted the books into two piles: one for keeping, the other to put back into the system. This didn’t do a lot of good, since they were still in my living room. It was interesting to see almost everything had flea market price tags, where I presume they did not bring the prices marked on them. Of the books I wanted to get rid of, I separated them by genre and immediately posted them on Freecycle. I found a set and a half of Tae Bo VHS tapes, so they were their own set. the tapes went within a day or so, but the books were harder. The large number of religious books went quickly, but the rest resulted in no-shows, so I held onto them. I gave some books to someone at work who knew someone who would love them and a VHS or two for classroom use, and I gave some of the VHS tapes to family. This still left quite a stack. A lot of the books were children’s books, and I was reluctant to get rid of ones my kids might want to read. I gave a lot of the decorations to my mother. Months later, I am still whittling the stash, occasionally posting them in groups, being glad someone will find them useful and that they will no longer crowd my small home. As time goes by, I feel most of the books will be gone, but there are a pretty fair number that I found interesting or useful. This really wasn’t a typical experience. I feel like this person had received the stash unknowingly as I did, and she was simply overwhelmed and wanted to pass it on rather than throw it all out.

My other experiences have been nice and very manageable. Last year I received several lily plants that I simply took home and potted on my patio. Today I picked up a medium-sized box of toys for children, hoping to give them to my mother, who works as a babysitter and has a special stash of babysitting toys, and to donate much of the rest to my work, where we can always use some new things to keep the kids busy, which I disclosed when I messaged the lady to see if the items were available. The items included are very nice, very clean. There are several Easter plushies, which I plan to give my girls for Easter next year, as well as my cousin-in-law’s daughter. There is a lot of play food, which my younger daughter loves. There is a play child-sized chef’s jacket, which will be perfect for the preschool, as well as several other items. There are baby items that my cousin-in-law will probably enjoy. For now, the items are in a box i have started of items I want to give away as I get the opportunity, a box my family walks by regularly that they know they can add to. If I discover there is an item I would like to request, I know I will have something to offer before I ask, a requirement meant to be a way to maintain balance in the group.

The moral of this story is to not be greedy, to be flexible, and to give back. I only have so much space for items, so much time to enjoy each possession, but also so much of an opportunity to give back and share the bounty of a full life. You do too. I would encourage anyone who is in need as well as those who have room to give to try this program out and see what it gets you, and I bet a feeling of helping the community will be a healthy part of the bounty.

Drift: Stories from Newport Beach

Author:  Victoria Patterson

I really enjoyed this book--so much so that I was quite sad to reach the ending. The plots are original and carefully formulated, as are the intertwining characters. The continuity is flawless, even if the book does jump about in time. The voice, one of innocence, experience, and sometimes a bit jaded, serves the writer well. I felt so sorry for Rosie coming of age in such a brash, unprepared manner. John Wayne brought about pity and wonder and a hint of childhood wistfulness in his eternal shoeless journey.

This book would be a good introduction to those interested in a.m. homes and her masterpiece "The Safety of Objects." It would also be a muted hint at J. G. Ballard's controversially unsettling yet engaging novel Crash. Thus, it is a great introduction to literature that takes risks.

Overall Rating:  5 of 5 Stars

Pull Tabs for Ronald McDonald House

http://www.ronaldmcdonaldhouse.com/help.asp 

I have been racking my brain trying to find ways to help others that are within my grasp.  I do not have a lot of extra cash, and my talents aren’t going to make a lot of noise, unless there’s a bake sale involved.  Still, there are some things I do to help out.  Generally this includes volunteering through 4-H and Girl Scouts, but then I remembered the pull tabs.

Every time I drink a soda or other canned beverage, I try to recycle my can, even if that means sometimes carting the can home with me.  At that point, I put the can with its brethren in a trash bag until the bag fills up.  At this point, the bag goes to my sister or older daughter, who removes each pull tab before sending the cans off for recycling.  She puts the tabs in a large, clean container, such as a rinsed out milk jug, large Ziploc bag, or plastic pickle jar and holds on to the slowly filling jug until the 4-H fair rolls around, at which time she puts our tabs with the tabs of the other members of our club.  The other clubs collect their tabs as well.  It isn't unusual for the public to bring in some pull tabs either.  At the end of the fair, which will take place next month here in Clark County, IN, all of the tabs are weighed to see which club has the most.  This club wins bragging rights as well as the honor of having their photo taken for the local newspaper as they hand over the tabs to someone from the Ronald McDonald House.

Of course, anyone can save tabs.  It’s something you already have if you drink anything in a can.  They don’t take up much space (which is part of the reason the RMH asks for them instead of whole cans), so they aren’t in the way, and shipping is easier.  I think the best part is 100% of the proceeds are donated.

If you want to help save pull tabs, do it!  Ask everyone you know to do the same.  It’s a great activity for churches, youth groups, and even schools (Many schools have a donation display/collection point set up, but if yours does not, there’s no time like today!).  Many people I know have set up a jar in their break rooms at work specifically for the can tabs--just check with your supervisor first!--and some have even started collecting points with local schools or colleges.   Once you accumulate them, you can contact the local RMH branch for further instructions, and probably even your local McDonald’s.

Once I have de-tabbed the cans, I generally let my girls split the money we get from recycling them.  In the future, it would be wise to get a can crusher so they take up less space.  This is a really great program that I think more people should participate in.

Tomato Girl

Author:  Jayne Pupek

There is a certain grace in the face of hardship factor that really makes me root for Southern fiction protagonists. This book made me ache for young Ellie, knowing that everyone around her would fail to help her through life’s struggles in the end, that she would have to grow to take care of herself in a different way than anyone else could. In that way, this book reminded me very much of the books Ellen Foster and Make Lemonade. There is such a danger for youth when the ones they count on the most cannot be counted on. This story is a prime example.

Ellie’s mother, who most likely suffers from severe bipolar disorder with psychotic features, swings like an off-kilter pendulum between inappropriate happiness to anguish, doing things I could not imagine. Her relationship with Baby Tom in the jar while he is refusing to nurse is a prime example of this. I saw this as a brilliant relationship opportunity for Pupek to explore and was glad she did. It was very original and sad with a tinge of the blackest humor. With the added injury until the point of her dramatic and somehow relieving death, Ellie becomes her crutch, leaning hardest as her husband brings in a teenage girl for help but ends up leaving with her.

All in all, this book has a flair for the dramatic, making it an enjoyable, fascinating read. And any book with baby chicks is likely to win me over. I hope to read more of Pupek’s work in the future. 

Overall Rating:  5 of 5 Stars

Twlight: Vampires Without the Bite

 My Mardi Gras vampire costume from this past Halloween.

My  Rating: 3 of 5 Stars


I really wanted to love the Twilight series. After all, I did honeymoon in Romania and eat Jonathan Harker's meal from the Dracula novel at the Golden Crown! I am generally intrigued by anything vampire-related, so I have given the series a try. I find them a bit lack-luster and overly safe. The notions of chastity and being torn between two choices are overdone throughout the series. The characters seem like they could be filled out more, since some seem like they could be really interesting. Violence, a necessity in the vampire world, seems to be a minimal detail, making this romance story a bit less paranormal than promised, with the conventions (sparkling in the sun, anyone?) seem a bit random.

I do strangely enjoy watching the films, however, as the talent are quite attractive, and the music tends to be excellent. While the hairstyles aren't quite on-point, the wardrobe is usually nice. All in all, I watch the movies when they come on TV, but I do not buy the merchandise or flock to opening night. If the series is lukewarm in so many regards, how can I be expected not to be as well?  Besides, the squeaky-clean aspects make this franchise acceptable viewing with my daughters, who always want to share interests with Mommy and Daddy.

Six Fang Marks and a Tetanus Shot

Author:  Richard de Nooy

This book is so vicious and tender and, in short, real. I really enjoyed seeing the relationship between Ace and Rem evolve as the story unfolded. The accident prone quotes gave the book an extra kick and added to the mystique of Rem and seemed hip rather than out of place. The artwork was disturbingly great.

Overall Rating:  5 of 5 Stars 

School Memory Scrapbooks

 Autumn and Farrah at Autumn's class Halloween party.

Most children, mine included, purchase a yearbook.  This is a good way for kids to have pictures of themselves and their friends in a format where they can look back at the year gone by.  The autograph section always ends up being something special.  Years from now, they can look back and say, "Oh, I remember how nice/nasty/flat-out weird that student/teacher/principal was!"  Or, "Look how different I have become."  Even year-to-year, this can be a nice activity.  The problem is, this memorabilia represents such a small slice of the school year, that many important events may be forgotten.

My solution to this actually comes from a project my older daughter had to do last fall at the beginning of her third grade school year.   She was given a packet of about six pages stapled at the side like a book in which she answered questions about herself.  She told her favorite hobbies, colors, classes, etc.  She also had the opportunity to write about how she thought her future would shape up.  The teacher took a copy of her yearbook picture and attached it inside to show how she looked.  It was a great little project that gave a nice snapshot of her at that moment, as well as a wonderful keepsake.  Again, this is a small snapshot of a bigger picture, but it is still better than just the yearbook.

What I would like to start doing is to create a binder with clear plastic page protectors inside to protect the documents.  Inside, ideally, there would be entries from each month.  Pictures, special reports or projects, journals from my daughter about the milestones of the year, report cards.  There would also be interest inventories like she filled out for class to see how and when she changes, if this can be done without being too repetitive.  There would also be Valentines, handouts about field trips and class parties, and whatever else.  Maybe there could be notations of height and weight.  In short, this would be a great place to store memories as well as a way to have her create while developing her writing skills.  My daughter loves this kind of stuff, so maybe other children would as well.

On my own, I would like to set aside some time to make a journal of my own about how she has grown and changed (and stayed the same).  This could even begin at birth if you are a new mother looking to create a legacy.  This can be made in the open or created in secret to be given at some milestone: graduation, marriage, when your child has a child, if that is in the cards.  I used to journal a lot for my daughters when they were babies but never kept it up.  Maybe now is the time to start.

The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the Toddler Years (New Father)

Author:  Armin A. Brott

I know this guy has written a series of parenting books just for fathers, which is nice, but this guy comes off as a hack. The research-backed suggestions were alright, the ideas for taking care of business beyond fathering was a bit novel yet disorganized. The real problem area were the suggestions the author made on his own, which ranged from silly (If it isn't too cold out, strip down to your underwear with your child and go out in the yard and paint each other head to toe; if it is too cold out, go puddle jumping or drive through puddles in the car. Seriously? ever thought about neighbors, hypothermia, or hydroplaning?) to what I consider to be dangerous (Teach your one-and-a-half-year-old to shave you without the razor on the handle, and when they get that down, let them shave you for real. This is dangerous for you, and it also draws unnecessary attention to razors. Even with razors hidden, a 4-year-old boy in my daughter's preschool managed to slip into the bathroom one night after he was presumed asleep and shave himself, drawing blood and scaring the daylights out of his parents, even when the razor was hidden.). Not what I like to see. The parts that told about what to expect at each age was sparse and overly colored with his own children's experiences instead of real research into what is normal. To top it all off, he ended the book with a section on how to get through a divorce and come out as much on top as possible. Not very encouraging, and not really appropriate. He also tried to champion being non-sexist, but then he was a bit sexist himself at times.

That said, I know there's a draw to having a book written just for dads, and I think it's nice to get something for a new dad, but this book is not it. Stick with the "What to Expect" series, which is very good, support the dad, and the rest should fall into place.

Overall Rating:  2 of 5 Stars

Donuts with Dads

This morning Autumn’s school held its annual Donuts With Dads breakfast.  Her last school had this event, but she was unable to participate since my husband Ben was working the day shift.  He works nights and evenings now, so it was just a matter of him staying awake a few more hours, a small sacrifice for some rare quality time without Farrah or me horning in.  Since Farrah is the ultimate Daddy's girl and my husband works so much, Autumn's chances of one-on-one time outside of specially scheduled events are usually slim.

The way this works is the dads and kids come in before school during the normal breakfast time.  Since the cafeteria is divided, the kids who aren’t participating get one side, and the kids who are get the other.  The pairs stop by a table manned by parent volunteers to get a donut and a carton of milk before sitting down and enjoying themselves.  Autumn’s previous school was pretty small, so the whole school did this on the same morning.  This school, however, is quite large--there were seven classes of kindergartners before the school split into two to give primary students (preschool, kindergarten, and first graders) their own building, and these numbers were pretty much in line with the rest of the grades.  There is a healthy-sized crowd, but it is less chaotic than if there were hundreds of dads swarming in at one time.  The line wasn't horribly long, and they had a leisurely breakfast with time to talk and mingle with other father-daughter pairs.

This was a really good experience for them, second only to the Girl Scouts father-daughter sock hop they attended several years ago.  It would be nice to find a way to make little outings like this happen more often.

Yogurt Mix-Ins

This is a fun project we did at my daughter's preschool for the monthly parent-child activity.  Both the children and their parents enjoyed this activity a lot, even though it's really simple.  It's fun, easy, and can be done in about five to ten minutes.  Depending on what you mix into your yogurt, it's also a healthy snack.  The ingredients and amounts can be modified, but this is a good starting point.

First, take a cup of yogurt.  We used vanilla, although it can be any flavor. If your child has a milk allergy, we also tried this with mixed berry soy yogurt, and it was just as delicious.  Put the yogurt in a bowl.  Add in a tablespoon of granola.  Next, add in some mixed berries (about a tablespoon and a half).  We used frozen and thawed, but fresh would work just as well.  Also, take one large strawberry (also previously frozen) and a third of a banana.  Using a plastic butter knife, your child can cut these into small pieces to add in.  Stir all of it together, and it's ready.  We used two spoons so parent and child could share, but it's also easily enough for one person.

This activity is a good chance to bond in the kitchen, but it also teaches motor skills (cutting), math skills (measuring), and lessons about following directions.  If you want, this could be an opportunity to talk about healthy snacks, food groups, and protein.  We didn't, but it would have been a prime time.

Mama Gena's School of Womanly Arts : Using the Power of Pleasure to Have Your Way with the World

Author:  Regena Thomashauer

This book looked like it was going to be sort of naughty, especially since the cover has a review comparing the author to Anais Nin, but it was really more hokey than anything. Hm, yes, let me visualize running away with a millionaire to Romania where we will have conceive the next wunderkind... Not gonna work. This feel-good drivel fluff was too painful to finish, even by skipping around to look for good stuff after a straight run became impossible. At least I got it at Goodwill instead of paying full price!

Overall Rating: 1 of 5 Stars

Hand-Sewn Conversation Heart

This year for Valentine's Day, I didn't have a lot of money to spend on my husband.  Add in the fact that he is difficult to shop for, as most guys are, and I was presented with a prime opportunity to give him something from my individual heart and not a shelf.  Since this project only took about an hour to make once I figured out what I was going to do, it was something I could knock out pretty quickly while the girls sat beside me on the couch watching TV and my husband was none the wiser.  If I knew how to use my sewing machine, this project would be much shorter.

Last year I sewed him a whale.  It was sort of beige and gold on its body with music notes on it.  The body was white with tiny red hearts printed on the fabric.  Its eyes were blue stone beads that were more like blobs than orbs.  It was overstuffed and I didn't think the flip the fabric when I sewed it, so it was unique to say the least.  Still, he saw the sentiment behind it and the hard work I'd put into my creation and said he loved it, adding nicely that, no, it wasn't ugly--it was cute.  Picking up my sewing box, I hoped this would not be a repeat experience.

The first step in a successful sewing project is to know what you're going to make and how you'll accomplish this.  I couldn't give my husband real candy and wanted to give him something thoughtful.  After creating a stuffed conversation heart for Autumn's class Valentine's Day party and having pretty good luck, I decided a repeat performance was in order.  Whereas she wanted hers to simply say "Be Mine" on the front, I needed something more special.  This made me think of his goth side and love for vampires that would also go with the dark romantic decor we're building towards in our bedroom, where he would likely keep it.  After many lame ideas ("Bite Me" would just send the wrong message!), I slept on the idea.  Eventually, I thought more about our Romanian honeymoon and used the Internet to search for how to say "I love you" in Romanian and found it to be "Te iubesc."  It was perfect.

The next step was to gather my materials.  I had some nice red fabric left over from the other heart.  I also needed my needle, ink pen, shears, and thread.  I used a spool that swirled between shades of purple, blue, and maybe a tad bit of pink, as I am running low on thread colors, but it still looked nice and added to the dark romantic feel more than a generic blue or black.

I folded the fabric in half and drew half a heart so that when I cut it out along the crease, both sides would be even.  It is important here to mention the heart needs to be a little bigger than the finished project to allow room for stuffing and seams.  Mine was a bit larger than my hand when I was finished, but it can be as large or small as you would like, keeping in mind smaller hearts may prove more difficult.

This is a good time to write the message on one side of your candy heart in ink.  If you mess up, you can flip the fabric over; do this step after the sewing begins or try to wing it...not so much.  It's easiest to write in block capital letters, not to mention the most authentic to the candy being mimicked.  After writing out the message, I sewed over the letters so the message was visible and the ink hidden.  If you don't want to just sew the letters, you could use fabric paint or even sequins or beads, and that would look great as well.  I made sure the lettering looked okay, and it was time to put together the pieces of my heart (pun intended).

I made sure the two pieces of fabric were facing each other with the edges lined up, message facing inside.  If your heart is large, you may want to pin the seams together so they don't move on you.  With mine being a smallish size, I could keep it straight fairly easily.  I started sewing from the bottom near the point and then going down, coming back the other side, and around.  Leave enough of a hole to flip the fabric and stuff your heart.  Any secure stitch should do as long as the stitches are kept small.  Leave about 1/3 of an inch between the edge of the fabric and the stitch.

After the sewing was done, I flipped the heart through the hole I left open.  I poked Poly-Fill stuffing into the hole, using a pencil to push it into the corners and humps of the heart.  Be sure not to over-stuff or your seams could rip, and your heart will look lumpy.  I overstuffed yet again.  After this is done, stitch up the hole.  Doctor up and little holes or gaps as needed, and there you have it.  I paired mine with a complementary homemade card with bats, flowers, a representation of us as vampires on our wedding day, along with the message "Te iubesc" on the card to match the gift.  He really enjoyed it, busted seams and all (I'd misplaced the other heart and had to use his for hot potato "Hot Hearts" for Autumn's party, and it apparently took a beating I didn't have time to repair before the big exchange), and put his gift in our bedroom immediately.

Ashes to Water

Author:  Irene Ziegler

When I received this book for advanced reviewing, I was pleased to find the author was kind enough to write me a little note inside; the matching bookmark was a very nice touch as well. As a little side note, such small, intimate touches do not go unnoticed. I will also note this did not shade my opinion of the work itself.

As far as the book itself, I am giving "Ashes to Water" 4 stars out of 5, but it is closer to a 4.5. The story was imaginative, insightful, hard to put down, but not perfect. I loved the beauty of the language, the way details and descriptions seemed very real, or at least very beautiful or hard-hitting. reading the author bio and seeing Ziegler's stage experience made me think that in some ways she wrote these things as a playwright would, in a way in which the words must do so much more than say a line--they must characterize, move plot along, etc., in a way that is minced in so much of regular writing. Other times, the descriptions disappointed me a bit, as I wasn't sure what was being said. I read the chapter about Marguerite and Eugene in the boat several times, trying to discern how much was coincidence, how much was planning, and whether I had just missed something that would make it less surprising. Sometimes it seemed like ideas needed a bit more fleshing out to tell me what I needed to know. Still, I found my way through and enjoyed the liveliness of her wording. I write like this much of the time, so it was good to see someone else using a similar style.

As far as characterization, I really liked the characters. They were quite diverse, in appearance, jobs, mentality. I liked how different chapters had different viewpoints and knowledge bases, and these were kept separate quite carefully. I think the scene of Dade fishing near the end was nice, something he more or less deserved or would appreciate. Even when a character had bad points, they were usually endowed with good aspects too, which created rounder, better characters. The insight into pyromania, firefighting, addiction, family bonds, and mental illness seemed well-researched and fresh compared to what I have seen elsewhere. It made me wonder how much she knew before setting pen to paper and what led her to these niches of experience. Too often today is writing lazy, with authors sticking to what they know or what is popular, so these little details make Ziegler stand apart as an artisan in her characterizations.

The story moved along pretty well. It didn't lag, although the clip seemed to combust near the end in an almost hurried fashion. Things started to be mentioned rather than happen, and the ends that were so tangled may have been a bit frayed before they were neatly tied up. I think the death toll was a bit high, and I would like to know a bit more about what happened to Annie and her sister and even the lake after the book ends, but I suppose that leaves more room for another volume. Perhaps reading the Lake House book sometime will help clear some of this up.

All in all, the book was not perfect but its sins were forgivable. I am glad to have read it and find its merits many.